Recently, I was involved in a panel discussion with our high school, small group girls. This was a great privilege for me but also took me out of my comfort zone. The topic was “Intimacy with God.” What does it mean and not mean? What is the importance of intimacy with Christ?
My initial thought was I can do this. When the day came, I was so fearful of being in front of the girls… just plain scared! My prayer throughout the day was for me to be vulnerable and transparent.
The first thing that God brought to my mind was King David. He was a man after God’s own heart. How am I like him and how do I differ from him? Do I seek God on a daily basis and spend time in his word? He asks us to go into a quiet place with no distractions. Well, that is kind of difficult with a two year old, but it is doable and important. How are the girls living in dorms able to get alone-time with they live with 20+ others? All of these thoughts were running through my mind. I just needed to communicate what I do on a daily basis to have intimacy with God, plan and simple.
Instead of studying His Word while thinking What’s in this for me?, I would rather ask What is he trying to say to me? I want to be more of a listener rather than always expecting something in return. It’s also important to speak to God about specifics not just general things. Because I know that God goes before us and He knows us intimately, I have nothing to hide. Another component that I find to be the hardest is repenting of my sins. It’s tough to come before God and ask him to wipe my slate clean, especially when I don’t feel worthy enough. God knows that we are not perfect.
Lastly, something important that was communicated through our time with the girls was not to compare ourselves with others. I know that I’m guiltly of that. When I see someone who has this vibrant light of Christ shining through them, I wish I was more like them. Danger, danger! We all are in our own intimate relationship, constantly growing at our own pace right where he wants us.
I really enjoy what we are doing here. God is teaching me more about my relationship with HIm. He has taken me from where I was and grown me into the woman I am today. I’m so very grateful!